"I'll never [surrender a year's worth of wages in a dignified act of martyrdom]!"

Norway 0 - 1 Holland (Mark Van Bommel) 

"No commentator or football-journalist gets to tell me that I have to quit, you don't decide that," Åge Hareide said, before punching Bertil Valderhaug in the face and moonwalking out of the room singing "I will survive" in a hitherto unheard of falsetto voice.

Ok, ok, that last part may not have actually happened, but it would have been one hell of a press conference.

To be fair to him, Åge Hareide played it by the book. When you face a team like Holland who score many if not most of their goals on the break then obviously you'll want to defend deep, stay compact and be very cautious when sending people forward. 

Still there was something deeply depressing about the way Norway was set up last night. Hareide has been spewing lofty rhetoric ever since his appointment, talking about creating "proud moments" and whatnot. Where was that sense of pride when Hareide, when push came to shove, decided to split the promising-looking partnership of Iversen and Carew, stick Iversen out wide and go for a conservative 4-5-1 at home?

Hareide: As long as he knows how to love he knows he'll stay alive

 As it turns out, lofty rhetoric goes out the window when the going gets tough. But this half-assed approach, this wish to play a more expansive game but when the heat is on not having the testicular fortitude to stick with that philosophy, is a damning indictment of Hareide's reign. 

In his third and final qualifying-campaign when he has nothing to lose and can do anything he wants to, Hareide chooses the careful, pragmatic, sensible path. Bengt Eriksen, that witless gimp, is right (which in itself may well cause the universe to implode, so watch out): There was too much sense and not enough madness in last night's Norwegian performance. 

But hey, as it turns out, the Norwegian football association and their incredibly creepy-looking president Sondre Kåfjord doesn't think going a full calendar-year without a win and being bottom of our qualifying-group is cause for concern, so everything must be alright then.